Riddles, Jokes, & Puns- Oh my!
Riddles
What is 6 inches long, goes in your mouth, and is more fun when it vibrates?
A toothbrush, c’mon!
What is a word in which the first two letters signify a male, the first three a female, the first four letters a great man, and the whole word a great woman?
Heroine.
What’s the difference between a knife fight and a dinner party?
About six more glasses of this wine.
You’ll find me once in the morning, twice in the afternoon, but never in the evening- what am I?
The letter o.
What does a man have in his trousers that a lady doesn’t want in her face?
Wrinkles.
What’s old, white, full-of-shit, old, white, full-of-shit, old, white, and full-of-shit?
Trump on a merry-go-round.
Knock knock jokes
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Etch
Etch who?
Gesundheit!
Knock knock
Who’s there?
A little old lady
A little old lady who?
I didn’t know you could yodel!
Knock knock
Who’s there?
KGB
KGB who?
We will ask the questions! (said in Russian accent)
Puns
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger, then it hit me.
Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I’ll show you A-flat minor.
What is the difference between a nicely dressed man on a tricycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle? A tire.
If we arm the teachers, will the librarians get silencers? (Too far?)