Man Hands

By Julie Warren

I am attracted to manly hands. For years I believed that you could tell how well a man was endowed by the size of his thumb. I believed that the bigger the thumb the bigger the package. I have spent a lot of time checking out this anatomical detail on men. I would blush around a fellow I suspected of sporting an exceptional endowment and grow sympathetic with one I did not. In fact, I believed this logic to be so exact that I would opt not to sleep with a man simply because his thumb was too small.

I was discussing this observation with a friend recently, as I observed the average thumb size of a guy standing next to us. She chimed in that she had been reading a book that discussed this very concept. In the book “The Brain in Love” by Daniel Amen, MD, he reviews the relationship between the size of a man’s digits and the size of his genitals. Needless to say, I was intrigued. It seems that the thumb itself is not the tell tale sign, but rather the relative size of the index finger to ring finger. Amazingly this has been extensively studied in highly respected medical and scientific journals.

The majority of men have a ring finger that is longer than their index finger (the pointing finger). The bigger the ring finger to index finger difference, the more masculine the man will be, and very likely the bigger his manhood. Interestingly, women are the opposite. The majority of women have a shorter ring finger than index finger. The theory is that the length of the ring finger is determined by the amount of exposure to testosterone in utero (whilst a bun in the oven). Higher levels of testosterone exposure correlate with a longer ring finger. This makes sense as testosterone is closely linked to masculinity.

My friend told me she fit the expectations in that her ring finger was shorter than her index finger. I was curious and checked my ratios as well. What I found was shocking! My ring finger is longer than my index finger!! The implications of this finding are astounding. It seems I was bathed in testosterone as a fetus!

Studies have shown that women with this feature have more masculine tendencies. My God!! This could be the root of my girly-girl challenged-ness! I may be too masculine to be a girly girl. There might be more to it than mere naïveté! I may actually lack the biology for perfect hair and spritely outfits! I was by nature more like Sporty Spice or GI Jane.

As I researched further I found that women with manlike ring finger are good at sports. In fact one study found this trait to be a sensitive predictor of which competitive female runners were most likely to win a given race! The running aspect has something to do with increased cardiovascular abilities that are attributed to the effects of this early testosterone exposure. Those with shorter index fingers, however, are blessed with superior intelligence. This would suggest that most men suffer from inferior intellect when compared to their shorter fingered counterparts. Affinity towards writing, math proficiency and musical ability are also characteristics that tend to relate to finger formation. As you might expect, many lesbians exhibit this trait.

Medically, the length of the ring finger in women has been shown to correlate with increased fertility (the long ones) or increased proneness to cancer (the short ones). Longer ring fingers, for example, indicating greater exposure to testosterone, suggest an increased risk for heart disease, while a shorter ring finger, more closely related to estrogen levels, correlates to increased breast cancer risk. Autism has also shown a relationship to this feature.

Since this incredible discovery, I have been frantically looking at hands. Checking out thumbs was so much easier than trying to determine the ring to index finger ratio. Hands don’t hold still long enough for that observation. I would see a girly girl, or a man who was stereotypically gay, and try to see if the finger theory held up. So far all I have accomplished is creeping people out with my staring.
Freelance blogger and writer Julie calls the Rocky Mountains of Colorado home.  Published online and in print, Julie’s topics of interest include ontology, or what it is to be human, how to be your best self and pubic hair (not necessarily in that order).